BEFORE adopting a 93.5 pound dog...

Before adopting a 93.5 pound dog, one should consider the following things:

 - the dog is 93.5 pounds--that is close to the weight of a female black bear
-  the dog is 93.5 pounds--and produces byproducts fitting an animal that size
- the dog is 93.5 pounds--floors shake when the dog sits
- the dog is 93.5 pounds--the "play time" growl sounds like "I'm going to eat you" growl
- the dog is 93.5 pounds--the "fun" bark sounds like the "not-so-much-fun" bark
- the dog is 93.5 pounds--and thankfully is good natured ...although I wouldn't wrap myself in hotdogs to test this assumption

Book published... only took 2 years...

Published a Book

2012

Motherhood is NOT for Babies... a story of dating, mating, and procreating

Sounds easy...find a guy, marry him, have kids, and get a dog. Do you have the right stuff?.............yea...me neither.

http://www.amazon.com/Motherhood-NOT-Babies-Dating-Procreating/dp/1935766651/

Another Justin and Jeff video

More college education money at work:




http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=M6o2cSoI98k

Emptyishnesters can... adopt a Full Figured Dog!

 We are now proud owners of a full figured part vizsla/weimaraner... 88 pounds of love and joy.  Her name is Nuka..    Watch her weight loss progress on this exciting blog! I will keep you posted weekly!  We believe that she is good-natured, however we haven't tried to take piece of food away from her yet.

Empty Nesting Holiday prep

Something is horribly wrong.

Why am I calm and happy during the holiday prep time?  I need to sort this out.

- after 19 years in the same house--the learning curve of Christmas decorating has finally kicked in. No more struggling with creating the impossible bow (did that in 1994 -- still functional). No more wondering what lights to put where (mastered that in 2005).  Where to get the tree?  Home Depot...25 minutes total task time, including travel.   If by some cruel twist of fate, I suffer complete loss of eyesight, I will still be able to place each nutcracker in its proper military line guarding the left side of the fireplace mantel.
- no "extra" demands are made of me by pesky kids.  How was I supposed to create the perfect holiday mood with everybody here?  The laundry, grocery shopping, driving, sporting events, and foul smelling sneakers put a huge cramp in my Christmas spirit.  Since now I grocery shop only when Tom's hunger pains force him to seriously look at the ingredients on the side of the dog biscuit box. I have more holiday cheer time.
- shopping for the perfect presents for three boys used to drag me down.   As soon as I walked through the shop lifting metal detector chamber at Best Buy (on the way IN - why is that?), I would get the "entering the gates of hell" feeling.  The heat, the overbearing crowds and the satanic employees, created that holiday Hades experience  Now...what to give the 21,22,25 year olds?  Cash.  Done.  Ahhhh.

I think that I am starting to figure it out.

 

Emptyishnesters can travel on holidays!

Thanksgiving at Rancho Bernardo Inn in San Diego.  I highly recommend it.  There is a fantastic spa,  world class golf course, amazing restaurants, and the rooms are luxurious!   

grand kids and grandparents

My sister's back yard bocce ball court next to her vineyard...similar to my backyard. Justin and Robbie championed over Steve and Jimmy.

trust fall - Steve and Robbie

with Dad on the putting green

Jeff and Kelsey

Emptyishnest is happy to introduce...

 ...the video debut of the Howe brothers ... written, directed and acted in by the 2 brothers...

see if you can pick out which 2 actors belong to the Howe family....

(caution *** one swear word in the video...)




http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OTYuh6NJkeo&feature=plcp

She takes her civic duty seriously - a role model for all of us...

GILBERT, AZ - A Mesa woman was arrested Saturday after she allegedly chased her husband around a Gilbert parking lot in an SUV during an argument over the presidential election.

The woman finally ran over her husband, leaving him with critical injuries.

According to a Gilbert police report, the argument started over her husband's lack of voter participation in the recent election.

Holly Solomon, 28, apparently believed her family was going to face hardship as a result of President Barack Obama's re-election.

Solomon's husband, Daniel Solomon, told police his wife "just hated Obama" and was very angry he was re-elected and blamed the President for problems her family is going through.

Witnesses reported a lot of yelling just before Holly got into a Jeep SUV and began chasing her husband through the parking lot near Gilbert and Elliot roads.

"He got out of the car and she was screaming at him. And he started walking away and she started driving in circles around him and she wouldn't let him go so finally he took off to try to get away and she ran into him," a called told a 911 dispatcher.

Daniel reportedly took refuge behind a light pole while Holly drove around the pole several times while continuing to yell at him.

Police said Daniel tried to run away toward Gilbert Road as Holly pursued him in the vehicle.

She eventually struck her husband and he was pinned underneath, between the vehicle and a curb.

Daniel was taken to Scottsdale Healthcare Osborn Medical Center and remains there in critical condition, according to police.

Holly was taken into custody and booked into jail for domestic violence charges of aggravated assault, reckless driving and disorderly conduct.

Police said there were no indications that Holly was impaired by alcohol or drugs during the incident.

According to a police report, Daniel told police his wife is six months pregnant.  NICE

Copyright 2012 Scripps Media, Inc. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

Read more: http://www.abc15.com/dpp/news/region_southeast_valley/gilbert/gilbert-pd-man-run-over-by-wife-for-not-voting#ixzz2C8toSNRK

Sneak Preview for book!

Ok 2 fans... here is a sneak preview of the book.  I'm hoping to have it available mid-December for purchase of either the "e" book or the paperback.

It has to go through one more final proof edit and then it will be on its way.     I'll keep both of you informed!

visit Starved Rock State Park - Utica, Illinois

No pooping while falling...

I caught it!

wild Vizsla

sounds bad

cool caves

425 million year old sandstone... 

this is my kind of hiking

We had a fun empty nesting day of "hiking" in Starved Rock State Park.  There are 13 miles of boardwalk ish trails that are nicer than the deck in my back yard.  The area got it's name from an historic Indian fight in the 1760's where one tribe was surrounded by the enemy tribe on the bluff and then starved to death-- no snacks at happy hour for them...

Since I am counting my daily calories backwards from my cocktails I might have been ok...

http://www.starvedrockstatepark.org/              fyi

Why healthcare is so expensive - election day info

Your Duck is Dead-- A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away." The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?" "Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the vet.. "How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something." The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room.   He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room. The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck." The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!" The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $150."  copyright aunt pat

Daily RX for Empty Nesting - Volunteer

Tinkerbell

Spiderman, Ninja and Poo Bear

 
  First of all, I want to admit to my 2 fans that I am a horrible volunteer. 

 Years ago, when the boys were all in grade school, and I had some extra time during the day, and I needed an excuse NOT to have time to exercise... I decided to seek out some charity work.  I thought that this would be a good way to give back to the community.  I had actually not done very much volunteering (outside of the kid's schools) and looked forward to the adventure.  After much consideration, I decided that the program best suited for me was to deliver food to the elderly.  It was a two day a week commitment for 3 hours each day.  My job was to go to a local church hosting the food prep service, load my car with food boxes and assorted drinks, then drive to the eagerly awaiting hungry old people. As I packed my car with the lunches, I noticed that all of the other delivery volunteer helpers were so cheery.  I could tell that they actually took pleasure in the work--it filled them up somehow.  Ok - good.  I wanted to be like that too!  

   I received the driving directions to the various apartment houses and started out my beneficence with a happy heart.  The first destination parking lot was full. Parking was impossible due to the four door sedan Buick Electra-like vehicles taking one and a half spaces due to their sheer 1980 gas guzzling size.  I tried not to be annoyed as  I counted the spaces vs cars in the lot while I schlepped the cooler from a quarter mile down the street to the entrance of the building (47 cars and 75 marked spaces...).  Upon entering the front door, I was overcome with a blast of heat wafting a smell combination of  ca-ca, and pee pee.  I wondered how long I could hold my breath...not long enough.  In an effort  not to gag, I chose to breathe only through my mouth even if it meant that my lips would no longer cover my dried out teeth.  OK--just so you know--these places are really dingy.  The lighting was yellow, the walls were covered in flocked yellow wallpaper which decorated the stained yellow velour chairs.  I zig zagged my way around the halls to find the apartment number and knocked on the door.  A giant old man with no shirt on and more chest hair than godzilla, answered the door.  I hoped that my wide eyed, dry toothed face did not betray my sheer inner terror.  This was a big, strong, ancient, half nakie guy.  I kept saying to myself, “please don’t be a serial killer... please don’t be a serial killer”.  After I introduced myself, he sort of grunted and then sat down at the table while I prepared his lunch.  I took the time to surreptitiously observe him.  Other than a disquieting resemblance to a Yetty, he looked able bodied to me.  As I opened the milk carton for him , I couldn’t help but think, “you know mister-- you could probably open your own damn milk”.  

And so it was at that point that I realized that I might not be perfectly suited for this type of charity work.  

That being confessed... now that I have empty nesting time...I have started volunteering at the Glen Ellyn Children’s Resource Center. http://www.gecrc.org/    It is a great organization and I actually like going to the tutoring with the kids.  We took them out for trick or treating yesterday.  The kids were so appreciative as was the staff.  They always need tutors and helpers for the kids.  I highly recommend it.  Since  this comes straight from the computer of the most jaded of volunteers-- you know that this is a worthwhile activity.


 

Empty Nest Money advice - I like it!

http://money.cnn.com/2012/10/01/pf/empty-nest-finances.moneymag/index.html?iid=HP_Highlight

Dog Days...tribute to a good/bad dog

Dog days

When our Vizsla dog, Dandi, turned 13 she began to slow down.  Passing squirrels and bird shadows no longer interested her.  The much hated neighbor, walking the much hated neighbor’s dog, failed to invoke her former Kujo. She turned up her nose at her dog food even when mixed with sour cream, or mushroom soup, or cottage cheese, or chicken broth. That is, unless it was human hand fed, one sticky kernel at a time, several times a day, while her favorite music was playing... and all the planets were perfectly aligned.  To make matters worse, she was sporting, what we affectionately called,  a “butt nugget” dangling from her behind. Not a pretty sight for us (previously) sausage loving Chicagoans. This 3 inch long unwanted shadow was the cause of much conversation.  We didn’t want to put her through a surgery at her advanced age, yet when the vet suggested that the growth itself could be the cause of her future demise,  we decided the kielbasa had to go.

   The good news was that when Dandi went in for her one month post surgical appointment, the vet  declared  the “butt nugget” removal  a complete success.  I was thrilled for two reasons:
1. Dandi was free of the menacing meat byproduct  
2. We were personally given credit for the new veterinary term “butt nugget”.
Furthermore, I was happy that the categorization of this new affliction did not involve the actual last name of the founder...such as “Howe Hiney” or even worse … just “Howe”... (ie., look at that poor soul with a horrible “Howe” hanging from his butt).

  Around this same time,  I heard a rumor about a 3 year old female Vizsla that needed a home.  I knew that it was true since the information came from the hairdresser hotline.  My friend’s hairdresser heard it from her friend’s hairdresser.   Hairdressers and bartenders are always in the know. (You probably cannot guess how I am aware of this fact.)   Upon further investigation,  the unwanted dog turned out to be a 4 year old male Vizsla.  I was less excited about raising another male in household.  Already outnumbered  with three sons and one husband, I would have preferred another female for moral support.  I did want another dog however,  so I rationalized to myself by saying that a neutered boy dog is kind of like a girl dog.  I had another obstacle.  I had not informed my husband of my plan for second dog. I knew that in order to achieve my goals, I had to be VERY excited about the idea during my sales presentation to Tom.  Tom  worried about taking in an older dog that had most likely developed bad habits such as biting people and peeing all over the house.  I poo-pooed that notion and begged him to agree to a trial dog visit.  Tom acquiesced just in time, since the dog was already on his way to us.  

The couple pulled up in a minivan, opened the passenger door and, as if catapulted by a sling shot, the dog bounded out of the car . Crazed from lack of exercise and attention, he leaped wild eyed around the yard.  The man said nothing and the woman hurriedly handed me the dog’s leash. Leaving no room for  possible “suckers remorse” from us - they departed in a flash.   In less than five minutes this brown jumping bean became our new pet.  I honestly thought Tom was going to kill me.    Dandi witnessed the exchange from her perch on the top deck and for the first time in many months she ran down the back stairs in order to check out the commotion. She greeted new dog, (whose name was Achilles), with great enthusiasm and it appeared to be love at first sight (cougar like love - but love nonetheless).  He sat dutifully while she licked his “face” and ran through her points of inspection. She outsized him by at least a head, and her old age took nothing away from her firm control of the situation.  In the short time of their meeting in the yard, she regained the liveliness of her puppyhood.  Just as Mrs Robinson had a skip in her step, Dandi was rejuvenated. Witnessing the extraordinary transformation in our old dog, Tom commuted my sentenced execution.

After three glorious years with her boy toy, Dandi started to deteriorate. The family  encouraged her as she willed herself to stand up. We followed behind her as she tackled the stairs... always ready to catch her if necessary.   Each step she took was wobbly and rickety with the constant threat of complete collapse.  Her eyes glazed and we saw that the painkillers were no longer effective.  We saw that it was time. I called the vet.  It goes completely against a mother’s nature to have to make this decision.  We are innately built to protect and to nurture life - not the opposite.  Veterinarians must  be required to take classes in order to comprehend the foreign language that comes from the devastated dog owner sobs as they attempt to make the most difficult of appointments.  Somehow, our calm vet understood as I requested, “she....snffff...not... wah...wah...doing... wouaaa wouaaa wu wu wouaaaaaaaaaa”.   

We decided to give Dandi, our beloved family member, a final, favorite day.  She loved the water; but most particularly she loved the waves.  She was a surfer dog.  Viszla’s do not have webbed feet and are not known for their swimming prowess, however Dandi was a California girl at heart.  In Chicago, our ocean is Lake Michigan… no salt but decent waves all the same.  Tom carried her 50 pound skeletal frame down the sloping Indiana Dunes and at the shoreline she stumbled toward the water.  As if on autopilot, she wandered into the water and began to ride the waves.  Tom threw the stick. She retrieved it by timing the rolling water and gently surfing in.  Amazing.  Barely able to take a step without falling on land, she looked light and lithe in the cool, blue water of the lake.  It was like watching Phyllis Diller turn into the little mermaid.

The vet had cleared all of his appointments for us to come in.  He was kind and patient with us as we gnashed and wailed through his office - me in my sunglasses and Tom in his pulled down baseball cap.   The vet gave Dandi a sedative and she looked so relieved--as if she was finally pain free.  Next came the injection.  The end was serene.  Tom and I sniffled our way out of the office and said to each other, “OMG - that was absolutely hideous. ”  Now I know how actors summon tears on command... the director says, “think about your pet dog!”, and  the waterworks begin effortlessly.

We returned home and looked around at the reminders of Dandi that were everywhere; scratches across  the window screens; claw marks on the basement  door; baseball caps with chewed visors; stains on the carpet.  Having another dog helped our spirits considerably.  Our grief turned into obsession about with our remaining dog,  Achilles. We lavished him with attention and he accepted it graciously without casting judgement as to why so much love all of a sudden.  Friends asked us if Achilles missed Dandi.  I really don’t think that he had time to miss her while he was carried on his silk pillow and fed treats around the clock. I’m sure that his continual happiness to see us had nothing to do with the Beggin’ Strips that we kept in our pockets.  As the month’s passed by,  Achilles started to look like Jabba the Hut from Star Wars.  We had to channel our grief in a different direction.  Doritos and pumpkin pie...  now I look like Mama Cass.  

Well, it has been one year since Dandelion Sunshine Seven's death, and we miss her good/bad behavior.  We were blessed to have such a good/bad dog for over 15 years.  

Day 8 RX - Write a book (may take more than a day)

When you empty-ish nest you have time to write a book.

I have written a book.

To all of you empty-ish nesters, empty-ish nesters-to-be and true empty nesters...  I would like to share my knowledge of book writing to this point.

1. It is hard to write a book.  The clever words formulated in the brain turn into incredible dumbness when typed onto the page.  How can that be?  They were so fabulous in my mind... where did the crapola come from?
2. It is hard to re-write the book.
3. It is hard to re-rewrite the book.
4. It is hard to make the decision that you are finished re-re-re-writing the book.
5. My mother read the book.  She loves me and thinks that everything I do is fabulous.
6. My sister read the book. She loves me and thinks that everything I do is fabulous.
7. My husband (sort of) read the book. He  loves me and does not care what I do as long as it will make money.
8. I have for-warned the boys (husband and dog too) that they are the subject matter in the book and the stories are true (so there is no suing for libel or slander).  Since they have only ever seen me cooking slabs of meat and folding laundry, I don't think that they took me seriously.
9. Technically, I finished the book in February, 2012.  I sent the book to a professional editor whose name I found online.  She did come highly recommended... too highly apparently, since her book queue for editing was initially 3 months, then 5 months and then 6 months....  When I didn't hear back from her after 7 months, I gave up.  I decided to take the project back and start looking for an alternative editor.
10. What to do?  With my confidence in the project waning,  I sought advise from a woman who is a college professor and tutored on the side. I met her many years ago and give her complete credit for raising Jeff's ACT score by 6 points ...a miracle worker.  She became a willing editor and a cheerleader.  Book edited in 5 weeks.  Self esteem re-established in the same amount of time.
11. Hmmm - now how to publish book?  I am going through this process now and will continue my thoughts for Day 9 RX.  Writing your book will keep you busy in the mean time.

Day 7 RX- go to live concert before they are dead

Yikes - spanx to the rescue!

We're through being cool.

These pictures are intentionally fuzzy in order to trick you into thinking that you (and they) are not as old as you (and they) really are.

Day 6 RX - Eat!

Slumming it in western Michigan.  Sunset in Glenn, MI and deliciousness (Hacker Pschorr beer not shown) at Everyday People Cafe in Saugatuck. MI... do it.

Day 5 RX - A good book and a good blog

This is book recommendation is taken from one of my favorite bloggers--www.meltingwings.com

Check it out!

Wow. This is one of the most powerful books we've read in ages. The plot - an assistant DA in Massachusetts with a loving wife and an only child - a teenage son, suddenly finds himself on the other side of the courtroom when his son is accused of the murder of a peer. 

The book is very cleverly written, told from the perspective of the father, it turns the reader into a juror who must decide guilt or innocence based on the evidence presented. We don't want to give anything away but the ending will blow your mind. If you are a fan of Turow, you will love this. Landay, the author, gives Turow a nice nod early in the book - “We humans are swayed more by stories than by abstract concepts like ‘burden of proof’ or ‘presumed innocent.’ 

This book led us to some major introspection. You will find yourself asking:

• What would happen to my family if someone in it were accused of murder? 
• How much do we really know about the people we love? Especially teenagers and primarily teenage boys?
• To what extent are parents responsible for the behavior of their children?
• Nature versus nurture. The science of genetics continues to unveil more connections between genes and behavior.

Read this. discuss it. It is hard to shake off after you finish it...

speaking of cats...

Only in Key West ...  a revered 6 toed cat from Hemingway's house... 

The cat's 10th life

Above is proof that the cat survived the bad renter harassment.  She does have a collar on now though. ..  a tangible reminder  of the prior week's harrowing experience.

Day 4 RX - "groceries"

A healthy refrigerator in Key West.

Now this is a great way to soothe the empty nesting blues.  As you can see - there is Diet Coke - so I do have something without alcohol being chilled.  The Rum doesn't need to be cold...

Day 3 RX - vacation

When seriously thinking it is sad to be an empty nester... please take a vacation!  Go on the spur of the moment - because you can!

I am excited to say that we are going to Key West to do some work to the condo.  Owning a rental property is not ALL fun and games, however. Saturday, I did receive a phone call from the security guard. He said that they are having an issue with  one of our renters that week.  When I concernedly asked about the problem ... he said, "Well, there is this lady(?), who has been drunk for 2 days.  She is running around the complex topless, trying to steal the neighbor's cat."   I wasn't exactly sure what I could do about this problem.  Perhaps the neighbor should keep the cat inside for awhile?  I will give you (all 2 of you)  an update as to the cat's condition when I get there.  I will also be looking under all of the beds for other critters that might have been captured and stored for safe keeping.  I sincerely hope that our friend on a bender is not a taxidermist.

Day 2 of EN RX

Day 2 RX

Ok - I'm out of ideas...  jk

I would like to prove to you that I am walking the talk:

New toe nails (old foot) next to a Vizsla

Today's empty nesting RX: walk your dog with a friend.  If you do not have a dog  - walk with a friend that does have a dog.  If you do not have a friend... ummm  ... not sure what to do there..... maybe try being a nicer person ... or pay someone.

Here are some things that you might see on your walk:

A fine specimen of a  yellow lab.

A tiny Vizsla on point.

A college grad and a college student attempting headstands on the beach... wait this is a different day...

A Bear's fan and his admirer.

  

While walking with your friend, you can cover lots of subjects such as:

 - poop bags

 - trash talking people who don't use poop bags 

- fun with  (empty) poop bags  (puppet creatures)

- as a side note you may want to discuss the joys and pains of life - but only after thoroughly covering the first three topics

Prescription:
 - One friend
- One or two dogs
- poop bag (s)

Dosage:
 - 1x 5 or 6 days/week

365 days of Empty Nesting RX

Mrs. Itsallaboutmenow

Helpful guide to all newborn empty nesters

Chapter 52
Many of my women friends are venturing out on this new unfamiliar phase of life.  Many are sad and struggling.  That is probably because they had girls and their children were well behaved and actually helped their mother.  But, no matter what the reason, I am determined to lighten the spirits of the down cast.
I feel compelled to start at chapter 52 since that is the amount of years that I have lived.   And yet, even though it is a lot of years, I am starting anew at this juncture.  The past 25 of the 52 have been completely dedicated to worrying about ; money, children,husband, dogs, (not necessarily in that order- usually the dogs came first).    Two of the three boys have graduated from college, the youngest boy has two more years at Indiana University.  We lost our 16 year old dog last year and gained a wonderful rescue dog who does not pee and poop all over the house unlike the former dog mentioned.  My husband loves his employment  and I can safely say that due to my obsessive compulsive budgeting, the money worry can take last place for the time being.  I retired from my job as a loan officer at a local mortgage company and am ready to take the next step in life.  What is the next move?  What is my purpose now?  I can think about myself?   Uh ohhh, guilt is taking over.  I should be making sandwiches or washing sweaty mis-matched socks that I found on the kitchen counter.  No... stop... It’s all about me now.  Here is my daily guide of what to do for the first year of empty nesting for all of those who are struggling to hash out their newly altered life direction.  You might even find that you LIKE it!

Day One:

First and foremost - realize that when you are 52 woman - you will most likely be sweating a lot.  Here is my take on random but chronic perspiration:

*** it is probably curable with abstinence from caffeine and alcohol - which means it is incurable.

OK - I’m glad that we handled that issue.

Day one is  time to go and get a manicure and a pedicure! You can do this now and for the first time ever you are able to leisurely wait until the nail polish dries!  No more driving to the grocery store with your knuckles. Even though it has been a very long time since you have treated yourself to this luxury,  do not be embarrassed by the amount of shavings that will pile up from the heel calluses.  Do not think that when the pedicurist begins a conversation in another language to her co-worker, that she is gossiping about the grotesque mountain of dead skin amassing on the floor.
And, when your personal summer kicks in, and your soggy, moist hands slip out of the tiniest of tiny manicurist hands and she says, “ohhh you wet”.... just smile and agree and convince yourself that she means that the nail polish is wet.  Most of this guide will have a lot to do with convincing yourself stuff because then it is magically true.

Before the manicure/pedicure, I want you all to have a healthy lunch.  Today, I took the Edy’s vanilla bean ice cream out of the freezer and let it melt for 5 seconds.  I grabbed a spoon and the Hershey’s chocolate syrup and then proceeded to scrape around the edges of the container for the softer ice cream, pour syrup directly onto the spoon and then eat.  I didn’t count the spoonful total  but I’m thinking it was somewhere between 5 and 45 bites - probably closer to 5.  The total calorie count could not have been more than a single serving, I’m sure.  Another major bonus - only one dirty spoon!  Easy clean up! I really insist that everyone try this on any particularly sad empty nesting day.  Instant cheer up!

Prescription:
- one manicure
- one pedicure
- one gallon Edy's ice cream
- one jug Hershey's chocolate syrup
- one spoon

Dosage:
- manicure : 1x2 weeks ish
- pedicure: 1x4 weeks
- healthy lunch: as needed for pain

No more feeling sorry for myself...

Tom and I watched the Ken Burn's documentary on Thomas Jefferson last night.  I love his recounting of history.  I was  interested to learn more about this founding father and his life surrounding the composition of the Declaration of Independence.  He must have been an extraordinary man.  However, as the story unfolded, I was surprised to learn that the REAL unsung hero(ine)was his wife, Martha.

Check this out:
During her lifetime Martha Jefferson bore seven children. Her son John, born during her first marriage, died at the age of three the summer before she married Jefferson. Of the six children born during her ten year marriage with Jefferson, only two daughters, Martha and Mary, would live to adulthood. Two daughters (Jane Randolph and Lucy Elizabeth) and an unnamed son died as infants, and her last child, also named Lucy Elizabeth, would die at the age of two of whooping cough. Martha herself lived only four months after the birth of this last child. (http://www.monticello.org/site/jefferson/martha-wayles-skelton-jefferson)

Wow.  Brutal.  Her  own mother died in childbirth having her.  Then from age 18 to her death at age 34, she witnessed the death of her her first husband, and 4 of her 7 kids.  Interesting also that there are no known pictures of her.

I am amazed by this type of female fortitude.  I'm still a wreck from the death of my dog last year.  I felt compelled to give some props to Martha.  What about some "founding Mothers"?   I vote for Martha Jefferson.  +1

This is one way to rid the "ISH"

The "ISH" are gone!

Yes - it is true.  I cannot properly blog when they are home.  I had to bring in professional help in order to resume my busy day of empty nesting.  I am very happy to report that after 10,000 loads of laundry, 1000 tanks of gas, 100 pounds of food  and approximately $1 million (give or take a few hundred thousand dollars)... they are gone

I'm now free NOT to:

 - think about what to make for dinner
- shop for dinner
- prepare giant quantities of food for dinner
- clean up dinner
- do laundry 24/7
-  open my wallet 24/7
-  take dirty sweat socks off of kitchen counter
-  worry about leaving out the tequila bottle at night
- wear clothes while blogging (JK - just making sure you are paying attention)

OK -time to go out to dinner!!! On a THURSDAY!!  crazy...

This could be my future... even the hairdo...

http://miami.cbslocal.com/2012/07/30/report-sea-hag-kills-man-over-beer/

Wow - can anyone lend this guy a hand?

Fla. Man Who Lost Hand Charged With Feeding Gator

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EVERGLADES CITY, Fla. July 29, 2012 (AP)

A Florida airboat captain whose hand was bitten off by a 9-foot alligator faces charges of feeding of the animal.

Collier County Jail records show 63-year-old Wallace Weatherholt was charged Friday with unlawful feeding of an alligator and later posted $1,000 bond. His next court date is Aug. 22.

The arrest was first reported by the Fort Myers News-Press (http://newspr.es/PVBBGP ).

Weatherholt was attacked on June 12th as he was giving an Indiana family a tour of the Everglades. The family said Weatherholt hung a fish over the side of the boat and had his hand at the water's surface when the alligator attacked.

Wildlife officers tracked and euthanized the gator. Weatherholt's hand was found but could not be reattached.

A criminal investigation followed. Feeding alligators is a second-degree misdemeanor.